50 shades of caliente

Cinco de Mayo is on my mind – I thought about making Mexican Wedding Cakes (delicious butter cookies with chocolate chips and cinnamon - a combination that will knock your socks off) and sharing the recipe here, but my mind is also on something far more indulgent: Adult fiction.

You read it right. Ever since I got my iPad I have been downloading free e-book offerings from Amazon. If you have never perused the free e-books on Amazon, you’re missing out. Tucked between spiritual fiction, Emily Bronte and Charles Dickens are some of the trashiest novels that have ever been committed to paper and ink. They look innocuous enough, but lurking behind their beautifully designed covers and seemingly innocent titles (stuff like A Bride by Wednesday and Double Dare) have stuff going on by page 12 that would make Larry Flynt blush.

Sex sells. It’s one of the biggest marketing mantras (so is “don’t start a meat market during Lent” - but I digress). So it really wasn’t a surprise to me to find this stuff on Amazon’s list, and I figured it was only a matter of time until someone brought it to prime time.

Enter the 50 Shades of Grey trilogy. I read all three books, pretty much without stopping. At a friend's recommendation, I downloaded the first installment out of sheer curiosity more than anything (and paid $9.99 for it – it’s not on the free e-book list). I finished it within two days. I was hooked.

If you haven’t heard, the trilogy is taking my demographic by storm. Women all over the country are snatching up the books, dubbed “mommy porn” by the media. Indeed, the romance between the main characters Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele has an unconventional nature: Grey asks Steele to sign a contract, and she agrees to be his "submissive" and to partake in a range of erotic activities. The stories were first published online, and as word of mouth spread, droves of people — many of them not traditional readers of romantic or erotic fiction — began downloading them on their digital readers (can't blame them a bit - book 3 has handcuffs on the cover, for crying out loud - no pun intended).

The author? An unassuming housewife from Britain. She just started her book tour this week, and she looks like, well, somebody’s mom. Dressed in a boxy Chicos-style jacket, she hardly looks like a sex kitten. And you have to give her props. I would have a hard time going to football games while keeping a straight face with my byline on a steamer like that.

Erotic fiction really isn’t my thing. I found the first book a tad disturbing at first, but the characters are pretty compelling (I know, I sound like people who say they read Penthouse for the articles) and it unfolds to be a pretty nice love story amid the flames. But we all could use an escape once in a while and there’s nothing wrong with escaping with a good book. Or three. Even if they talk about tying people up and stuff like that. Hey, I’m not going to judge.

So here’s to Cinco de Mayo, and here’s my recipe for Mexican Wedding Cakes. Whether it’s salsa or 50 Shades of Grey, celebrate with something indulgent and hot. Knock your socks off.

Mexican Wedding Cakes

1 cup (2 sticks) butter, softened 

1/2 cup powdered sugar 

1 teaspoon vanilla extract 

2 cups all-purpose flour 

2/3 cup finely chopped nuts 

2 to 2 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon

2 cups mini chocolate chips

PREHEAT oven to 350º F

BEAT butter and sugar in large mixer bowl until creamy. Beat in vanilla extract. Gradually beat in flour, nuts and cinnamon. Stir in 1 ½ cups chocolate chips. Roll dough into 1-inch balls; place on ungreased baking sheets.

BAKE for 10 to 12 minutes or until set and light golden brown on bottom. Cool on baking sheets for 2 minutes; remove to wire racks to cool completely.

MICROWAVE remaining chocolate chips in a plastic bag and microwave for  30 seconds; knead. Microwave at 10- to 15-second intervals, kneading until smooth. Cut a tiny corner from bag; squeeze to drizzle over cookies. Refrigerate cookies for about 5 minutes or until chocolate is set. Store at room temperature in airtight container.

Update: Someone shared this video of Ellen doing the audio version - it's a riot!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=on3JCwnwHbU